False Warranties
by Suzuki Katsuya
Summary: what happens when the warranties on the Millennium Items wear out? MADNESS! OC's! And RANDOMNESS! DUH!


Hollie: Well, I dunno.

Kim: IT'S STORY TIME!

Hollie: sweat drop I need some sugar…

Kim: hey! Yami has got sugar! takes it away from him HA! JUST LIKE YOUR PUZZLE, I TOOK IT FROM YOU1 HA!

Yami: You are no better than those tomb robbers…

Kim: I take that as a compliment!

Hollie: ENOUGH! ON WITH THE FIC ALREADY!

Kim: fair enough!

Disclaimer: WE DON'T OWN YU-GI-OH OR ANYTHING IN THIS STORY…except us of course...and our characters…and the plot thingy…

Chapter 1

_A long time ago in Ancient Times, the Millennium Items were created. But, what few people knew was that they came with a warranty. And as we all know, once a warranty has expired, the item has a habit of breaking…the Millennium Items are no exception…_

In the living room…

Both Ryou and Bakura were sitting on the couch watching television; Bakura was just about to fall asleep, as his light was watching some geography show, on Rome.

Bakura had had just about enough of this already, and reached over to take the remote away from him when Ryou growled at him.

"NO MINE!" Ryou shouted.

"WELL IM TIRED OF THIS CRAP!" Bakura retorted.

"LIVE WITH IT!" Ryou shouted back to him.

Bakura gave a look of pure venom. Then he lunged at Ryou and began to choke him Homer style. Crack came a deafening sound. Bakura stopped immediately. He looked down to his ring. It had snapped in half. "YOU FOOL! WHY DID YOU-"He was cut of by a weird twirling sensation. He looked around…"Why Ryou, what on earth was I just doing?" Bakura asked.

"Why you asking me? I have no idea!" Ryou said slumping back into the couch. "Wait a second…what the hell is this crap!"

Bakura looked at him funny. "I do believe you were watching this, and I was getting bored. But now that I look at it, I don't see how I could've gotten bored. It seems so fascinating…"

"What are you! Some kind of sissy yami!" Ryou shot, looking at him with contempt.

"Just because I have a thirst for knowledge doesn't mean I'm a sissy Ryou," stated Bakura patiently.

"Yeah, whatever Bakura!" sneered Ryou. With that being said, he left the room, to go to the kitchen.

Walking down a street somewhere…

Malik and Ishizu, were walking down a busy road, down town Domino.

"Sister?" Malik asked.

"Yes Malik"

"Can I have your god card?"

"I do not have that card anymore Malik; I gave it to Seto Kaiba, besides even if I did have it, I would not give it to you! You already have one!"

"But you didn't give me a birth day present!"

"Oh Malik, quit your whining!"

Just then two cracks sounded off.

"What was THAT?" Malik asked.

"I'm not sure" Ishizu said unsurely. Just then her necklace fell off. "What the-"she stopped, and looked down the the street. "OH SHINEY!" she squealed and lunged at the road.

Malik stared. He had never seen his sister act this way. Just then there was a clang from behind him. "What?" he turned around to see the millennium rod on the ground, in pieces. "Sister! Look what happened to m- OWWW!" He doubled over on the ground, clutching his crotch, "WHAT IN RA'S NAME!" he shouted in pain. "RA DAMN IT THAT HURTS! OHH THE AGONEY!"

Ishizu turned her attention to her brother, who lay on the ground in the fetal position, writhing in pain. A glint off of his earrings caught her eye. "SHINEY!" She ran over to Malik, climbed on top of him, trying to rip his earrings off.

Just then Cassy turned the corner and caught sight of the commotion. "What the- GET OFF OF HIM!" Cassy tried to rip Ishizu off of Malik. When she managed to get her off, (Malik still on the ground in pain, minus a pair of earrings) Cassy yelled at Ishizu, "WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR PROBLEM! YOU'RE SICK! INBREEDING!"

Ishizu saw Cassy freshly polished nails and said, (you guessed it) "SHINEY!" Then tried to rip Cassy's nails off.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Cassy ran away….well started to, but remembered Malik clutching his groin.

"Oh dear sweet Ra! Why do you punish me so? MAKE IT STOP!"

Cassy sweat dropped. "Uh Malik? If you were horny, all you had to do was get me you know…"

"NO NO IT'S NOT THAT!" he shouted.

"Did somebody kick you in the wrong place?" she asked.

"NOOOOO!" Malik yelled.

"Want me to kiss it better?"

"That's a great offer cassy, BUT THAT WONT HELP! I THINK IT'S BROKEN!"

Cassy stared. "Uhh Malik, there are no bones…you know, down there..."

"IT HURTS!"

Cassy sweat dropped again. "I could still kiss it better you know…"

"NOT HERE! JUST GET ME TO A HOSPITAL!"

"Ok!" cassy said simply.

Kim: HA1 MALIK IS GIMPT! Even though that was mostly my idea….HES STILL GIMPT! HA HAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Hollie: sweat drop Um, you do know when Malik reads that he's gonna try to kill you…

Kim: naw ill just chase him with a chicken. HE WILL CRINGE IN FEAR! AND SCREAM LIKE A BABY! HA! HAHA! HAHAHAHAHAHA

Hollie: Well, whatever.

Lorilei: You're starting to sound like me…

Hollie: Well, I'm just making up for the fact that you don't appear in this fic.

Lorilei: WHAT! WHY NOT? . 

Hollie: Well, listen, do ya really want to?

Lorilei: No.

Kim: yea…ok anywhoskies….REVIEW PPL! OR ILL CHASE YOU ALL WITH CHICKENS! HA! HAHA! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Review! Flames will be used to roast Marik. Rotisserie style! toothy grins …..mmmm yummy!

By: Suzuki, and Lorilei


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